Monthly archives: September 2021

Death & Reborn: A Single Mother’s Story

IBARAT MATI HIDUP KEMBALI: SEBUAH KISAH IBU TUNGGAL

Tabi basa & selamat petang semua. Pada hari ini saya ingin berkongsi sebuah kisah berkenaan dengan seorang ibu tunggal yang terpaksa berhadapi dengan cabaran beliau tersendiri dan bagaimana beliau mengatasi kesulitan hidup yang beliau hadapi. Anda boleh membaca ringkasan kisah Rhea (bukan nama sebenar) dibawah.


Sakit lagi di hiris pisau, sakit lagi apabila kita ditinggalkan oleh orang yang pernah sebumbung dengan kita. Hari ini, saya nak kongsikan sedikit, melalui pengalaman hidup saya sendiri. Sebelum itu, saya ajukan kepada anda semua satu soalan: ada tak wanita di luar sana yang mahu jadi ibubapa tunggal untuk anak-anak?

Buat saya, itu sangatlah mustahil dan sangat sukar. Akan tetapi, saya mesti bergerak ke hadapan (move on). Pahit, manis, pedas & masam – saya kena telah semuanya.

Terjadinya keretakan di rumah tangga saya sehingga nama saya tidak asing lagi nama saya disebut dimana-mana, dikalangan sepupu-sepupu, makcik-makcik saya sendiri serta di lingkungan kenalan saya. Keluarga terdekat saya pun tidak kurang hebatnya bercerita akan kisah saya sehingga yang biasa pun menjadi luar biasa. Bahkan saya digelar sebagai wanita yang tiada masa depan.
Kiri, kanan, depan dan belakang, semua cerita pasal saya.

“Eh, dia tiada duit ke nak sara anak dia?” dan banyak lagi yang mereka umpatkan berkenaan saya di luar sana.
Siapa mereka untuk menghakimi saya?

Namun tidak mengapa. Saya bersyukur kepada Tuhan kerana telah mengurniakan keluarga yang selalu ada buat saya. Tuhan telah memberikan ibu & bapa yang sentiasa ada buat saya walau di saat saya jatuh, di saat saya terpuruk, dan hampir putus asa dengan hidup yang saya jalani. Mereka memberi kata-kata semangat agar saya kuat demi anak-anak saya.

Apabila saya sebut “ibarat mati hidup semula” ia bermaksud, disaat saya dipukul masalah terbesar dalam hidup saya yang hampir membuatkan saya jadi gila, Tuhan hadirkan berkat terindah dalam hidup saya yang tidak pernah saya lupakan. Tahu tak, pada masa yang sama juga saya telah mendapat pekerjaan baru, iaitu kerja dengan sektor awam.

Sebelum itu, saya pernah berdoa memohon kepada Tuhan agar dikurniakan perkerjaan yang bagus dan peluang untuk mengubah hidup saya dan anak-anak. Biarlah orang di luar sana dapat membuka mata dan melihat bahawa tanpa seorang lelaki pun saya boleh hidup. Ternyata, Tuhan mendengar dan mengabulkan doa saya.

Bagi saya, menjadi ibu tunggal itu adalah luar biasa. Menggalas tanggungjawab sebagai ibu dan ketua keluarga agak mencabar bagi saya. Menjadi mak sekaligus bapa kepada anak-anak itu bukan satu hal yang mudah. Saya tidak boleh menyerah. Saya mendidik hati saya untuk menjadi wanita besi dan menjadi wanita yang menjadi kebanggaan kepada anak-anak. Bagi saya, menjaga masa depan anak-anak adalah sungguh penting.

Saya sudah sediakan semuanya buat mereka. Dari aspek tabungan untuk masuk universiti 20 tahun akan datang pun saya sudah buat untuk mereka.

Pada masa ini, kisah silam biarlah kekal menjadi kisah silam. Saya gembira dengan kehidupan saya sekarang – sudah memiliki kerja tetap, ada perniagaan sendiri, kereta sendiri dan akan datang adalah rumah saya sendiri. Produk baru saya dan jenama saya sendiri pun di dalam proses pembikinan.

Buat gadis-gadis di luar sana yang mungkin mengalami nasib yang sama seperti saya, jangan pernah takut untuk bangkit semula. Status kekal status, namun kita juga manusia. Jadi, kita harus bergerak ke hadapan dan jadikan impian kita satu realiti. Lelaki boleh datang sendiri sekiranya dia benar-benar cinta akan kamu.

Buat lelaki-lelaki diluar sana, tidak semua janda itu murah dan tak semua janda itu tiada masa depan.

Terima kasih kerana sudi membaca. ❤️


DEATH & REBORN

Blade hurts, but what hurts more is when we are being left by the person who once lived with us. Today I’d like to share about my story. Before that, I’d like to ask a question to all of you: is there a woman out there who wants to be a single parent for their kids?

For me, it is an unsurmountable task. However, I need to move on for my kids. Bitter, sweet, spicy or sour, I have to go through it all.

There was a crack in my once blissful family until it shatters into a thousand pieces. My name even became the talk of the town, from my cousins, my aunties, uncles and within my family circle. The ordinary turns into extraordinary. I was even labelled as a futureless woman. That’s how bad it was for me.

“Eh, she doesn’t have any money to feed her kids?” et cetera. They kept on gossiping about me out there. Who are they to judge me?

But you know what? It doesn’t matter. I am truly grateful to God because He blessed me with my family that is always be there for me. God granted me my parents who always be there to assist me whenever I fall down and almost gave up with my life. They encourages me non-stop so that I am strong for my kids.

What I meant by “death & reborn” is when I was faced with this seemingly impossible challenge, God granted me the best blessing that I could never forget. Guess what? Amidst this calamity of my life, I also managed to land a job with government.

Before that, I prayed to God to grant me a good occupation and a chance to change my life for the better. Let those naysayers out there opened their eyes and see that I also can survive without any man. Indeed, God is great and answers my prayer.

For me, becoming a single parent is a extraordinary feat. Holding responsibility as a mother and family leader is challenging for me. Becoming mother & father to my children at the same time is no easy task. I cannot give up. I taught my heart to be an iron lady and become someone that they can look up to. For me, their future is my top priority.

I have prepared everything for them. From their university funds in 20 years’ time to the basic needs, I have it all prepared.

Today, let bygones be bygones and past remains a past. I am happy with my life now – having a stable career, owns a business, own car and soon, my own house. I am also doing my own product and my own brand.

For ladies out there who might be having the same problem with me, don’t be afraid to rise up again. Let status remains a status, but we are still humans. So, we need to move on and let our dreams come true. Your man will come to you if he really loves you.

For men out there, not all widow is cheap and not all widow is futureless.

Thank you for reading. ❤️

Tukang Rantek,
Claudius

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Abseiler’s Story: Conquering Fear of Height

Fastart Abseilers. From left: Kelly, Kevin & Harith.

Tabi basa & greetings everybody! Today I’d like to write about these brave souls that works as an abseiler. Abseiler is defined as a person who descends down a nearly vertical face by using doubled rope that is wrapped around the body & attached to high point. Most of the time, they deal with great heights & literally hanging out.

I took my chance to ask a few that I have met in person about their profession. They are trained & certified under IRATA (International Rope Access Trade Association) & internationally recognised. For beginners, Rope Access Level 1. For the experienced, they have Rope Access Level 2. Rope Access Level 3 is for supervisors.

Working at Height

When comparing IRATA and WAH, IRATA is internationally-recognised, while WAH is more local. In the work at height industry such as these, there are many regulations, laws & standard application such as FMA 1967 (Act 139), OSHA 1994 (Act 514) & DOSH Guidelines for the Prevention of Falls at Workplaces 2007.

To join this work at height industry, most important things is you have to be fit & has no fear of height, like what you’ll hear from these peoples: abseiler’s from Fastart & a lady on hiatus.

First one is Kevin Use’ Pahang, 26, from Long Apu, Baram. He has been working as abseiler for the past 3 years. His unforgettable experience is working rope-to-rope at 50m tower. The challenges as an abseiler is the fear of height, and a lot of things could go wrong. One wrong move, they would end up falling to the ground. Therefore, safety is their top priority. He hoped that this profession is not being regarded as lowly profession but as a profession that’s equal to the other. He also hoped that it can be extended across other industrial sector as well.

Second one is Mohd Harith Ugak Minggat, 31 from Sibu. He has been working as an abseiler for the past 5 years & have done lots, including changing flare tip, inspection at blasting tower, underside helideck, jacket leg & touch-up painting of crane’s boom. The challenge of working at height have him the fulfilment because he loves to hang at a high places. He hopes thay Rope Access technique is made more popular in oil & gas industry as well in TMM’s (projects, maintenance & construction).

Third one is Kelly Mutang, 39 from Lawas. He has been working as Blaster / Painter, BP team leader and BP supervisor. He is going to take his abseiling course & painting inspector next year. He loves the challenge that abseiling will grant him, though he also has to face the challenge of being far from his family.

Ain. Nang berani nya tok.

Last but not least, a rose among the thorn, Nurain binti Muhammad, 34 from Sibu. This happily-married lady worked offshore since 2011 and had worked with Oceancare, Velosi and lastly RIA Solution. The challenge of being a women abseiler is being understimated due to physical strength differences. But she proved that a woman also can perform as a professional abseiler & deliver their part to the hiring client, be it Operations or Maintenance team. She hoped that many more women will took up the challenge to be an abseiler because it is a good profession & break the stereotype of women being afraid of height.

I hope the story that I have written about these brave souls inspires you & broadens your career option, especially those who love to climb & enjoy the heights. Stay safe & take care!

Tukang Rantek,
Claudius

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The Story of Sikokok

Tabi basa, silamat brupagi, sramat isan-isan, slamat pagi & greetings everyone! Today I’d like to write about one of the stories from my childhood, which is about a bird callled “sikokok” (in Serian) or “Sikukuok” (in Bau). In English, it is called red-legged crake (Rallina fasciata).

It is a medium-large bird with size of 24cm in length. Its head, neck and breast red-brown, paler on throat. Its upper parts are grey-brown. Underparts and underwings are barred black and white. Its bill is green and its legs are red. But its most defining character is its red eye. 🔴A fiery-red eye, that tells us a lot about its true nature. It is like a ghost in disguise for Bidayuhs.👻

Bidayuh folklore revolves around our relationship with nature, with most of the spirits are manifested in physical world in apparition of animals. In this case, sikokok represents spirits that borders between life and death. It is also related to Bidayuh’s “pontianak”, despite its innocent look of a small bird.

The sound of sikokok represents a lot of thing. It could mean an impending death at a village. In a normal day, usually sikokok is silent. But when someone is about to die, especially back in the olden days where we were still practicing folk religion, sikokok’s sound from a distance at night means someone is about to pass away. We will gather at the person’s house at his or her final hour to give comfort to the family, as well as to be ready for anything, be it spiritual, or physical threat.

When I was a still a small boy, before I started my primary school, I like to sleep with my grandparents, a habit that seems to be followed by my nephew and niece. There is something so comforting with them around me as I fell asleep, especially when it comes to supernatural security. Usually I will wake up my late grandfather or grandma to accompany me for extra protection. But there was one time, I really want to go to the toilet. Suddenly, there was a sikokok’s sound from a distance.

Sikokok’s sound means an approaching omen, or something that might disturb us. There is a weird thing about its warning sound. If sikokok’s sound is getting louder, then that “thing” is moving further away. But if sikokok’s sound is getting further, that “thing” is getting nearer.

As for my case, at first, it’s getting louder, but then it became further away. It means, something is near. Then I saw a black figure seems to be walking around our house. There is no way that could have been anyone. It’s around 3am in the morning. So, I cancelled my wish to go to the toilet and stayed motionless on my bed to avoid getting unwanted attention and ended up wetting my bed. But that’s way better than being disturbed by that “thing”.

The next morning, I told my grandparents what happened, and coincidentally there was someone passed away on that night too, around 3am. So the “thing” that I saw is someone’s spirit roaming around for one last time before “it” left.

At the jungle, if we see someone, we are not allowed to called them by name. Instead, we will shout “wooo”. If they are human, they will reply by shouting “wooo”.

For many Bidayuhs, no matter where they are, “sikokok” plays a key role in our native story-telling as it is closely related to the afterlife and supernatural. It is sad that its story is not well-documented, and many of those who knew no longer alive.

👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻

TANEN SIKOKOK

Tabi basa ndug bala kende dangan silamat brupagi. Andu ti ku ira nulis pasal cirita de odog pidaan ndug aku wang ku lagi icek sani neh pasal manuk de odog taba ami sikokok de Kpg Pichin, Serian. Ganan ne ahi, Sikek, Sikekek, Sikukuk ato Sikukuok kuan Bi-Bau, pak kita bisi niju ndug manuk de indi ti.

Kai lagi manuk ti tantu bahas, Baak ne dangan koko’ ne nak bidaya mah kaler neh. Adeg dangan katap ne bihis-buda. Pak de kai buleh asat, bateh ne de pli kaler bidaya mung jawa apui. Kayuh kuan inya, mung mindu.

Tanen bala Bidayuh ti ahi ne pasal pimudip kita dangan tarun, ngin ahi bala kamang de dunia iti gayen ne mung bala pinatang. Dedeg sikokok ti, adeh inya manang ne nak tong kamang de nyaga pimudip dangan pingabus. Adeh lagi inya de manang ne “pontianak” Bidayuh mene pan riama ne mung manuk de icek. Ira ne maan toroi dari ato ngirantak turi kuan inya.

Angun sikokok ti ahi rati neh. Adeh inya manang ne pidaan pingabus de binua. De andu biasa, anyap angun kayuh ti. Pak wang adeh inya ira kabes, labih lagi sani neh wang ami lagi minan adat damba, angun sikokok de masu joho wang bingarum rati neh adeh inya ira kabes. Kita bigumpul bisindi duwah ramin inya de ira kabes tinan kita pirimpu asung bala nyahe, tangini pan kita ira sidiya asung kita dedeg kayuh de ira nantek kita, baik duwah kayuh de dapat dep tebek ne ato de anyap tanggah.

Wang ku lagi icek sani neh, sibayuh ku sikulah mangon, ku babar buus dangan bala tayung dangan turang babuk ku. Anak buah ku pan kelek ne buus dangan bala tayung babuk ne ngaya aku ngin pli lelek aku buus dangan bala neh. Lama neh wang ku ira kasing, garak ku tayung ato babuk ku ngancak ne nganted aku kasing. Aku mua maru tirawe sani neh. Pak adeh indi ngarum he, wang ku ira kasing, tipiya pli adeh angun sikokok. Mera tamang neh, tanan de rap ne nyap asung ku.

Angun sikokok ti rati neh adeh kayuh de nyinduk, ato adeh kayuh ira ngaco adep. De tusa neh, wang ne makin nyohon, makin joho ceh kayuh he. Pak wang ne makin retek, makin sinduk ceh kayuh he.

Balik ndug ciritu aku, angun de melen neh makin nyohon pli makin retek, rati neh kayuh he pli makin sinduk. Tebek ku adeh riama kayuh bihis de pinjan, mung kah ne panu de sapa ramin. Wang pkl 3 brupagi, anyap ceh inya pli gindong-gindong de awah. Kai ku jaji kasing. Biar ku kaset de amak masu ku napud kayuh he.

Andu dindi neh, ku pidaan dangan tayung babuk ku. Tantu lagi bala ne pidaan adeh inya kabus de binua ami ngarum he. Jaji kayuh de tebek ku he ihang inya de mbuh kabus ti, panu sibayuh ne tagan dunia iti.

De tarun, kan kita tebek bala dingan kita de plil joho, kai dep ngaba ganan neh, pak kita “wooo” ngaba neh. Kan nyahe neeh, saut ne balik minan “wooo”. Kan ne retek, aba nyiak neh. Tandah, bin ne ngajah adep maring.

Dedeg bala Bidayuh, dapih-dapih bala kita, baik de Bau, Padawan, Siburan ato Serian, sikokok/sikukuok/sekek ti ahi tanen neh ngin ne babar ngaban agah pingabus ato de kai tanggah. Pak mua lagi masi mikir ngin bala de puan cirita ti mbuh anyap.

p.s. cirita sikokok de ngade, ira madah buruh giradak wang ne pli biangun wang bingarum, nanda inya mbuh ira kabus ato adeh kayuh nyinduk.

Tukang Rantek,
Claudius

Picture Source: Wikipedia

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Note: Tukang Rantek means photographer in Bidayuh.

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